Every year at Thanksgiving it has been become a tradition for the girls of my family to get together the day following Thanksgiving to go the Christmas Bazaar. We love this day and look forward to it all year, saving our money to purchase those treasures but even more than the shopping we love to get together just us girls. We talk and laugh and just hang out.
This year I was looking forward to going even more than usual. Little did I know what the Lord had planned for me.
I purchased quite a few things, but one thing I purchased near the end of the day was a little wooden sign that had been hand painted with the following statement:
"Jesus Knows Me...This I Love."
Many of us learned the song as children,
Jesus Loves Me This I Know,
for the Bible tells me so,
little ones to Him belong,
they are weak but He is strong.
Yes, Jesus loves me,
yes, Jesus love me,
yes, Jesus loves me,
the Bible tells me so.
It struck me hard at the Bazaar how thankful I am that Jesus loves me but even more so Jesus knows me, this I love. I had repeated it over and over to myself and was so pleased to have found this little treasure. When I got home I hung it on my wall in the kitchen and frequently walked by and read it and smiled. Yes, I am so thankful He knows me, this I love.
But that isn't the end of the story.
This morning I had been praying and I felt the Lord speaking to my heart heal you. I have been struggling with chronic back pain but more than that I have been struggling with healing in my soul, those deep down areas of pain that only the Lord knows about. I didn't understand what He meant exactly, as I had asked for healing in several areas, so I repeated it to Him and asked what He meant by that. I asked Him to stay with me on this. I had a couple of books I have been reading lately so I picked one up and began to read.
Now it had been several months since Thanksgiving and I had been in fervent study of the Word and had been really seeking the Lord on some tough issues. But that morning I was reading in a book about the woman's heart and things like romance when I stumbled upon the following paragraph and it immediately brought me to tears:
Longing for Romance
"A woman becomes beautiful when she knows she is loved....This doesn't need to come from a man...God longs to bring this into your life himself. He wants you to move beyond the childlike 'Jesus loves me, this I know, for the Bible tells me so.' He wants to heal us through his love to become mature women who actually know him. "Therefore I am going to allure her; I will lead her into the desert and speak tenderly to her" (Hos. 2:14). And "You have stolen my heart, my sister, my bride" (Songs 4:9). Our hearts are desperate for this. What would it be like to experience for yourself that truest thing about his heart toward yours is not disappointment or disapproval but deep, fiery, passionate love? This is, afterall, what a woman was made for.
It was if He had just sat down beside me and put His arm around me and spoke tenderly Himself...
~ I know you, what your deepest desires are, how you need to be loved and spoken to, how desperate your heart is for love and to be known. I want to heal those deep places in your heart with My passionate love for you. I am not disappointed in you, and I long to see you mature in your walk with Me. I created you as a woman to show the reflection of My beauty and glory through your life. I know you, better than anyone and want you to know Me.
So to this I say...Jesus knows me, this I love.
Thank you Lord for healing me, though it may not seem I am healed from what I think I need, you know me and know where my heart needs healing. You alone are worthy of my praise. Cause your face to shine upon me. You're my glory, the lifter of my head. Thank you that I fearfully and wonderfully made. Thank you for seeing who I am on the inside and for healing me. Help me to want to know you more, to dig deeply into your Word and allow it to heal those broken places. Help me to know that you are not disappointed in me but that you love me deeply and passionately. Amen (so be it).
Quotes taken from the book "Captivating" by John and Stasi Eldredge